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2017 Police Log Year in Review: BWTM

by Paul Saulnier
January 1, 2018

All calls made to HPD are importent. Thankfully some are less important than others.

If you are the victim of identity theft and call the Police, who do you say is calling?

January 5:

Suspicious activity, Indian Ridge; blue tarp observed in the woods for over a week. Determined to be a small fort with 4 lawn chairs (descendants of Sitting Bull preparing for an uprising?)

January 9:

6:50AM, Disabled school bus, 155 Highland; Bus #10 on the side of the road empty (any chance that the kids walked to school? Nah)

January 12:

Animal incident, Oak & Hemlock; car versus deer. Minor to the car (major to the deer).

Massachusetts driving rule #4:

Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto a Massachusetts highway.

January 29, 2017:.

Officer Woods issued 3 citations before 3 AM and Officer Remkus added one more for good measure.

January 30:

Disturbance, CVS; caller stated a woman was yelling at her as she sat in her car, and then hit her car with the door of her car as she entered her car (someone was off her meds).

17 traffic stops today. I know what your thinking, being the end of the month and all, but it's not true.

February 2:

Crash, Washington & Washington Path; Holliston Honda rear-ended a Fall River VW, but no visible damage (although the VW later complained of a sore fanny).

February 5, 2017:

Suspicious activity, Elm; report of "legs and sneakers" coming through porch. Caller suspects old Halloween prank but called just in case. Owner advised.

February 24:

Lost & Found, High school; female party lost her cell phone (Oh, the trauma).

Retired Fuller Brush salesman makes do on a fixed income:

March 9:

Erratic driver, Washington & Concord; checked, OK, just avoiding potholes.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

March 12, 2017:

01:23, 01:36 and 01:56; while we were sleeping, Patrol Officer Remkus issued the first citations of the week to residents of Millis, Milford and Silver Springs, MD.

Disturbance, Gorwin; caller requested HPD for unwanted party (my brother-in-law? I thought he was your brother-in-law).

00:14 AM. Suspicious activity, Norland; caller heard someone outside bedroom window. HPD determined a deer walked by (HPD's own Daniel Boone?)

Ok. Here's my plan: I'll drive through town looking like a travelling circus and the police won't suspect me of not having a driver's license.

March 19:

Vehicle stop with summons, Washington & Pope; resident of Milford for non-compliant aftermarket lighting and unlicensed operation.

March 23:

02:44 AM, Suspicious activity, Cole Court; report of "something walking towards the street" HPD determined it to be a rabbitt.

BWTM: Downtown Holliston after the new lights are installed:

http://www.chonday.com/Videos/latrafucrazy5

March 27:

Crash, 1292 Washington; two Holliston residents exchange paint and compare insurance companies.

BWTM:

An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 AM and was asked where he was going at that time of night.

The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."

The officer then asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The man replied, "That would be my wife."

April 3:

10:30 PM, disturbance, Jennings; loud music. Advised.

10:50 PM, disturbance, Jennings; music turned down but yelling turned up. Advised.

Repo Man on Washington; it's 11:15 PM, do you know where your 2010 Cascadia Freightliner is?

April 16, 2017:

Erratic driver, Washington; checked Ok - just dodging potholes.

Vehicle stop with summons, 702 Washington; resident of Framingham for speeding and unlicensed operation (no license to lose so why not speed?).

April 23:

Complaint, Turner; report of people yelling and throwing items from balcony. HPD determined that they were playing video games (where can I buy one of these video games?).

BWTM

DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
TO GAIN A MINUTE
YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT. 
Burma Shave

An idea for Millenials: bring back two cans and a string. They never needed recharging.

April 26:

Animal incident, Foxwood; small white dog found (can I keep him, Ma. Can I, can I?)

May 2:

Animal incident, 50 Winter; car versus deer. Both left the scene (one with a little less paint, the other with a little less fur).

May 3:

Fraud, unknown person trying to open credit card accounts in the name of the caller (imitation not always a form of flattery).

Suspicious activity, Copper; several calls about yuts toilet-papering a house. Owner aware (not concerned if only new paper used)

May 10:

Crash with arrest, 1569 Washington; resident of Southboro ran into a law-abiding Holliston driver and was dutifully arrested by Holliston's Finest for OUI liquor, marked lanes violation, reckless driving and possession of an open container of alcohol ("But Officer, I'm hardly under the affluence of incohol").

May 16:

Complaint, Bogastow Brook & Winchester; resident complained of man going through the trash (Is this how Mr. Covanta got his start?)

May 19:

Suspicious activity, Walnut; report of a clown with a knife seen in the woods (the ticks will get him or her).

Crash. Sorry. Force of habit. No crashes today.

Animal incident, 381 Central; report of dead skunk in the road - "and it's stinkin' to high Heaven".

BWTM:

Is she from Massachusetts or what?

May 31:

Vandalism, Andrews School; front door broken into (such a thirst for knowledge is heart warming - even if only to learn of the penalty for B&E).

Animal incident, Central; report of injured woodchuck. Dispatched (won't be chucking any more wood any time soon).

June 19:

Crash, Mill; car versus rock. Two flats (and one dropped cell phone).

July 1:

Suspicious activity, 29 Church; stranger walks into the house to the surprise of the wife who hits him over the head with a frying pan. Just kidding. He said he was there to paint a room. She said "not in this house" so he left. HPD found him next door painting the bedroom. Darn. We could have had the bedroom painted for free.

July 4:

Complaint, Juniper; neighbor complaining that fireworks are landing in caller's yard. "Nine fingers" advised.

Animal incident, 258 Hanlon; report of a bear in the front yard.

Remember your mother's advice: never climb up a tree with a bear behind.

July 14:

Complaint, Maple; shirtless man with tattoo (in Holliston? What is happening to this town?). GOA

July 19:

Suspicious activity, Highland & Rolling Meadow; report of suspicious cooler bag on the side of the road. (HPD bomb squad confirmed it to be a bologna and mustard sandwich.)

July 23:

Complaint, Pleasure Point; caller reported that listed vehicle deposited trash in woods nearby. HPD spoke to the Hemlock Street perp who returned to the scene of the crime to remove the trash (Yes officer, I placed that envelope with my name on it under that pile of trash).

July 27:

No loose dogs today so HPD had time to issue one citation and one warning.

July 29:

Road hazard, Highland & Prentice; book in the road (War and Peace?).

July 30, 2017:

1:00 AM, Crash, Fisher & South; resident of Holliston for OUI liquor and wreckless operation (if you wreck your car in a crash, shouldn't it be called wreckfull operation?).

BWTM:

August 6, 2017:

Animal incident, Hollis; possible coyote sighting (first of many this week).

Animal incident, Jeffrey; sickly coyote (take two aspirin and call me in the morning).

Complaint, Overlook; red car parked in neighbors' driveway. Occupants smoking weed and then driving off (if you see them again, tell them to come to my yard. There are plenty of weeds in my graden they can smoke.

August 10:

Repo man on Ashland Street (Honey, where did you park the car?)

Erratic driver, 1145 Washington; report of possible intoxicated driver all over the road. Stopped. Driver said that he was coming from church (remember this one in case you need it).

Animal incident, Cottage; two pigs from Lakeview running around. ACO said she could not respond due to legal reasons (apparently pigs were not aware of Farm To Table dinner planned for later in the week).

Animal incident, 116 Locust; bear spotted in the backyard. Environmental Police declined to respond (don't call us for anything bigger than a ground hog).

August 18:

Crash, Mohawk and Mayflower; two Mohawk Drive ladies stop to talk - just not quite in time.

BWTM:

There is only one public restroom and it's at the other end of the TransAlaska Highway:

August 20:

Assist citizen, South; male on the side of the road looked lost and confused (how most wives describe their husbands).

August 21:

Animal incident, Washington and Curve; dead cat in the road. Hwy called but does not pick up dead domestic animals. ACO notified but could not find the cat. (not all that dead apparently)

Suspicious activity, Washington & Curve; report of man in boxer shorts and t-shirt holding a roll of toilet paper and rubbing his eye. Went into the bushes (at least he "went" in the bushes).

Sgt Waugh & Officer Hickey initiated 13 traffic stops in 3 hours. That's one every 14 minutes. No time for coffee or a donut.


Sertember 8:

Erratic driver, Norfolk; reportedly honking aggressively (might just be from Mumbai).

BWTM:

September 11:.

Animal incident, Concord; goat in the road creating a hazard (slippery droppings?).

September 15:

Hopkinton PD incident entry:

Cedar Street, caller reporting DMV ran out of gas, now car will not start. May need a jump (good to see other Dispatchers like a little joke now and then).

BWTM:

September 17, 2017:

1:30 AM, Erratic driver, Washington & Courland; driver admitted to "checking his phone". Advised.

05:00 AM, Animal incident, Concord & Baker; deer struck and dispatched by the Dispather sent by the Dispatcher to dispatch the deer..

September 18:

Animal incident, Bonney; mangy coyote spotted (who or what put those spots on the mangy coyote?).

September 19;

Animl incident, 370 Hollis; deceased deer on the sidewalk (dispatcher not dispatched by the Dispatcher.)

Animal incident, 45 School: owner of Buster called. Would like to be notified if spotted on the loose (even if he has no spots).

September 21:

Animal incident, 137 Concord; two dogs playing in traffic (my older brother used to tell me to do that).

BWTM:

 

September 27:

Assist citizen, Washington; resident placed on-line ad for free fire wood. Party took firewood from wrong address. Wood returned. HPD advised to use neutral spot like HPD parking lot for internet transactions.

Animal incident, Hargrave; white golden retriever missing.

Animal incident, Central; black lab found (turn him loose. We are looking for a white golden).

Suspicious activity, Marked Tree; report of elderly male placing eye glasses on utility pole (wants the pole to move when it sees him coming).

October 7:

Animal incident, North Mill; two males chasing injured pig. Crated. ACO notified.

Animal incident, 612 Norfolk; sick raccoon reported (no Mass Health. Leave him there.)

Animal incident. Hollis; injured deer in the road (covered under Obama care.Take it to the vet).

October 18:

Crash, Washington & Central; one Holliston driver took on one of those useless light poles we all hate.

October 27:

Road hazard, 157 Lowland; report of female with a fire hose (dangerous combination) spraying the road, causing a hazard to drivers.

October 29:

Smoke & fire, 62 School; smoke showing in the bedroom (hot stuff!)

Larceny, Saint Mary's; bicycle taken (guess who saw you. Better bring it back.)

November 2:

Animal incident, Lowland & Fiske; car versus deer. Dispatched (dumb deer)

Animal incident, Arch; report of injured deer. GOA (smart deer).

Animal incident, Fiske; deer hit side of Holliston car and ran into the woods (wonder if the car was an Impala?)

November 7:

Smoke and fire, Turner; burned item on the stove (Honey, would you like to stop for take out on your way home?).

November 9:

Suspicious activity, Central & Bullard; report of "older man walking in the area wearing only a t-shirt. Caller concerned due to cold weather" (his exposed extremities could freeze).

November 14:

Suspicious activity, Robert; caller found mouse traps set in the basement and no one living in the house set them. (Detective Maguire-Ryan to interrogate the cat).

Complaint, Skyview; harassing text messages from sibling (Sign of the times: siblings now text insults to each other)

November 27:

Complaint, Mohawk Path; several calls regarding a verbal dispute between neighbors (they're gonna need a bigger fence).

November 30:

Larceny, Underwood; computer mouse stolen from a mailbox (what kind of trap do you set to catch a computer mouse thief?)

December 4:

Animal incident, 215 Highland; car versus deer. No details (but driver now off Santa's Christmas list).

December 10, 2017:

02:30 AM, erratic driver, Washington; Hwy reported vehicle "all over the road". HPD followed car to town line .No violations (rear view mirrors not just for checking for food between your teeth).

December 18:

Erratic driver, Washington; reported by Milford PD. Stopped by HPD. Driver issued a warning for speeding and tailgating (seems like the car being tailgated should also get a ticket).

December 22:

3AM, Animal incident, Central & Dalton; car versus Donner (another driver off Santa's list).

December 19:

Crash, 2:37AM, 180 Mellen; VW Jetta versus utility pole (Bottom of pole now VW blue).

Crash, 100 Summer; Milford and Bellingham drivers leave Holliston with less than fond memories.

BWTM:

Happy New Year. Behave yourselves or I'll be writing about you on the HollistonReporter.com Police Log in 2018

 

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Comments (2)

That's good news, Jean. Would you like to buy a bridge?

- Paul Saulnier | 1/1/18 11:31 AM

Happy New year. Everyone has promised to obey all the rules in 2018 so there will be no need for the Police department or the log I WILL MISS YOU.

- jean morrissey | 1/1/18 10:53 AM

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